So You Think You Love a Girl

                                 So You Think You Love a Girl

“So you think you love a girl!” Great news! What next? Does the girl even know you? Do you think she’d ever love you? How do plan to win her over? … These are the common questions which rise up in the mind of a juvenile crush, and truly speaking these sentiments linger on no matter how many times you get rejected, and no matter how many girls reject you. Simply put, having a crush makes you feel young and energetic all of a sudden. No wonder Md. Rafi, Gulzar and the rest earned a handsome living out of their lovesick songs.

Now, however optimistic you are, make sure you don’t overkill the situation. Act natural, don’t put on a show of sycophantic obsession, don’t stalk her day in and day out, and for heaven’s sake don’t tell a thousand other people about your crush. (However, your ridiculous friends will probably nag you to death to find it out anyways). In other words, behave like the girl would, had she a crush on you: she would simply act weird and act opposite whatever she should, whenever you are around. (I remember being asked by a girl, “Cake?” and blurted out rudely, “NO!”)

Acting in such an absurd manner is not necessarily a good option; however it does give you a psychological edge momentarily. Let me explain myself here, it is much easier to win a girl who thinks you dislike her, than a girl who has firm belief you fawn over her. The element of surprise is the key here, and you’d do well to keep it in store for later. The downside being that you keep contemplating about the missed opportunity. I would not suggest you to do either specifically, depends on your capabilities actually, and more so on the nature of the girl. If she’s a high profile girl who seldom converses with menial beasts, I’d say you keep up the surprise.

Let us take a momentary pause and closely observe certain issues here. There is a stark difference between how boys and girls react to their crushes, girls blush and the color on their faces change instantly; boys on the other hand try their level best to divert the topic (by various arbitrary means, which by all means is out of scope of this discussion). However, to identify a girl’s crush is a Herculean task, whereas to identify a boy’s crush is like snatching candy from a baby.

Moreover, depending on the nature of the boy, there are several ways in which a boy chooses to profess his love, let us go over them one by one: (only a handful is described here, for trust me there are many)

The idiotic way: You go over to the girl, and without much hassle, profess your undying love to her. You even compare her to the sun and the moon and swear to be with her through infinity and beyond. Blame it on my pessimistic or on my skeptic nature, but I never think this has ever worked unless the girl is head over heels in love with you as well. 

The creepy way: You study the girl meticulously. You find out her interests, talk with a lot of mutual friends, find out her passion, if need be learn a few musical instruments (the guitar is the plebeian’s choice in fact), make songs for her. Finally, one fine day, you take the courage and profess your undying love for her, and sing the song you passionately made for her. Now, the element of surprise is present here, and if the girl isn’t really a very high catch, she’ll consider your proposal. Though again, this might turn out to be a "No". The common answer rejection quote you get here is “It’s not you, it’s me…..” (The rest of the answer varies from girl to girl).

The “being friends” way: Herein, you approach the girl, and make friends with her (sometimes through epic struggle and painful rendezvouses). You stay friends for a long time, and the girl starts confiding in you. You even get to come into her elite circle, and you believe you’re closer to your goals than ever. However, what in fact, really happens is that you’re as far away from her as possible, for you’ve just been “Friend-zoned”. In other words, she takes you like any other girlfriend, and believes you’ll help her get her true love (which is obviously not you). Any attempt made hereon, would result in “Gee, XXXX, I never thought about you in that manner. Can we please just remain friends”? This pretty much severs even the friendship which both of you shared.

----More to come ----